1. |
Old Chair
03:31
|
|||
Was barely there in time
A change of clothes in the suitcase
At least I saw you see me as the door closed
Now the sky starts to swerve
And the shepherd of my nightmares
Assembles himself just outside the window
Your old leather chair
Nobody dares sit there
Scared they might disturb your ghost at rest
And the benefit of the doubt
Doesn't seem so noble now
With me in this empty house
I had barely been asleep
I dreamed that you dropped your suitcase
As if you simply changed the place you live now
More angry than I miss you
And I can't control all my movements
I keep saying things that I know I'll never live down
But it's so nice to see
How every time you're smiling
Though I can't ever seem to show my best
You were taller than all my doubts
You were wrong, but damn I'm proud
How we filled out this empty house
But you wanted to say you'd passed their test
For the people who let you down
To say you were a good man
|
||||
2. |
BMI
03:23
|
|||
I choke on my own throat in my sleep
It sounds like a lawnmower if you're in the room with me
I had to buy a new machine that allows me to breathe
It makes me think I shouldn't be here, and maybe I shouldn't be
It's heavier than I've gotten recently
They ripped the cancer out of my face, I never left the TV
Treated every single day like a coin on a string
Never punch in my initials, never leave anything
I was never a failure because of my shape
It was always about who I was
And I've got this body that's trying to kill me
And I'm trying to be someone that I think it could love (I could love)
Given up on knowing which one came before
Hate yourself, assume they hate you, hurt your friends even more
Gonna break that wheel for once, keep what I can afford
I want to run out of things to forgive myself for
I was never a goner because of my fate
But I gave in and made it who I was
And I've got this body that's trying to kill me
And I'm trying to be someone that I think it could love
So shoulder the weight
Taking a dive now
Try saving face
Let everyone down
It's a fiction you can't learn from
Never was real
Nothing will fix you
When you don't want to heal
Never on time a day in my life
But I'm working to catch myself up
And I've got this body that's trying to kill me
But I'm trying to be someone that I think it could love
|
||||
3. |
||||
The garden's too far overgrown
It's precisely why I won't come around
It took me way too long to realize
The fear of God was an easy way out
Spray a little bit of blood for the cameraman
That's never gonna let me down
Call it easy like a coin on a string
Just don't get back up for another round
I wanted for people to see me forgive you
More than I really want to forgive
To know I overcame what you put me through
And I won't have to sit anymore with it
I drank until I couldn't pretend I don't see you
And I got these rings hanging under my eyes
Never going to punch in our initials
Or make it right
I could have done a single good thing
But I let the weeds simply overtake it
I could have stopped that wheel from rolling
Over the both of us instead of it breaking
I don't know if I can't be angry
Because I never gave myself a chance to dig
And now I'm calling you a punchline
Every time I let myself slip
I wanted for people to see me forgive you
I wanted the power of just being seen
I wanted for people to know what I won't do
Rather than ask you what you really mean
I move until your own words fall out of my skull
And I'll paint my own X's over my eyes
Just make it easier for me
Even if you have to lie
I wanted for people to know I forgave you
But I never really want to learn to forgive
I gave you the currency that you need to
Carry on hurting everybody else with it
I guess I'm learning to mean what I'm saying
And I'm gonna look you in both of the eyes
Man it's a cheap coin but its the heaviest one we could find
|
||||
4. |
Being Good
04:07
|
|||
Sorting through the things you never threw away
I came alone, they were all too scared to show their face
Never getting better, I don't remember it being good
Save for two weeks after you told me it would
It must be hard to live in your own skin
But it's easy to keep you away
Can't break the wheel if you're not gonna shoulder
The weight of the things that you say
I tried to force my way in when you locked me out
You were turning down the volume when it got too loud
It only comes out how you see it, I tried to work from memory
I hate you and I love you equally
It always follows beneath the water
And it won't ever let me relax
If I can't see you why even bother
With the weight of the love that I lack
I am tripping up the stairs
And crying in the bathroom
I am overwhelmed by every
Tripwire left around you
I am praying you cut us loose and
Left me where they found you
It must be hard to live in your own skin
Might be harder to keep you away
Can't break the wheel if you're not gonna shoulder
The weight of the things that you say
It always follows beneath the water
And I barely can keep it at bay
It's hard to see why you'd even bother
For so long with the things that I say
Neither of us ever see that room again
But I think I'll smell you smoking when the fan kicks in
I dreamt last night we met our eyes with laughter choked and hushed
An inside joke between the two of us
|
||||
5. |
Car
03:28
|
|||
I woke up again this time
I thought I had slept for weeks
Thumbing in my pocket
The last two times that I heard you speak
I am everything I was
You're passion at it's peak
Leg popped out of socket
You're still the last thing that I can't beat
Someone's getting left again
In the back of the car that I left you in
With everyone I ever hit
For years driving under your influence
And I could probably take you
See I'm still drunk inside my dorm room
Hiding from the Lord
Or shivering in back of the van while
My friends drive me through the storm
Was always dressed a little bit better
Than I could afford
Now find my body still laying on the couch
Getting everything I paid for
Feeling sorry for myself once more
Now if it's worthless, here I am again
In the back of the car that I wrote you in
I am all you'll ever be
Just synapses extrapolating memories
And if I'm honest, how the hell could I
Let a fraction of anything you are survive
But if you won't ever leave me be
Let me take my comeuppance and bury me
Because I'd rather just be forgotten
So if I'm getting left alone
Do I still want to be here to haunt my home
It's getting harder to stay convinced
That there's a light and we're gonna have to dig for it
And take it for whatever it is I guess
Stuck in back of the car where I blessed this mess
Not everything that I'd like to be
But regardless of whatever I'm now, it's me
And I could probably forget you
|
Midcard Austin, Texas
Midcard is a rock band from Austin, TX.
Streaming and Download help
Midcard recommends:
If you like Midcard, you may also like:
Bandcamp Daily your guide to the world of Bandcamp